When I first saw this video, I thought, “Aw jeez, now the Christians have their own 50 Shekel.” Then I realized, the Christians already have our 50 Shekel. This was followed by a sigh originating somewhere between lament and amusement. (c/o Ben Baruch)
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You Shmooze, You Lose
by David Kelsey
The Forward is by far the greatest Jewish newspaper in the U.S., and has been for over 100 years. Even that is an understatement, as it seems to suggest that there is a number two. The bleak reality is that secular American Jewish newspapers are generally controlled by their respective local Federations, and as such, are little more than public relations tools. When it comes to news, the Forward finds nuance when others find cliche. The Forward questions the premises behind the gathering of statistics when others simply declare trends. The Forward offers thoughtful analysis when others re-print press releases. It is critical that the Forward survives, and a terrible indictment on American Jewry that the Forward’s circulation is not ten times its current level.
But the Forward’s coverage of arts and culture is not helping its case.
The front page of its July 22 edition trumpets a new section, “a weekly romp through the lighter side of the news.†The Forward is about as able to “romp†as Der Yid was to hora. The new section, not even an entire half page, is a cut/paste job of secondary sources, a desperate attempt to appeal to the yiderati with a poor imitation of Page Six.
Although this new section, is in fact, not even an entire half page, it is appropriately framed with other sizzling hot, gossipy pieces such as “Looking Back: 100 Years Ago in the Forward†and the sure-to-interest-the-pop-culturally-obsessed: “For Yiddishists, Summer Is a Picnic – At the Cemetery.â€
“The Shmooze†includes an article on Sacha Baron Cohen’s fiancee, Isla Fisher, of whom the page writes: “busy with publicity, Fisher wasn’t able to take the Forward’s call.†The page, however, does list the questions it would like to Fisher if she had taken their call, which she wouldn’t even if she wasn’t “busy with publicity.†(Come on, she wouldn’t take a call from the Forward if she were stranded on a sand dune outside of Beersheva, delirious from dehydration with a cell phone that could only receive calls.)
Who does the Forward think they are attracting with interviews that don’t take place, and conjecture on what her answers might be? Why would anyone care about imaginary interviews when they can get real ones form periodicals whose calls are returned?
This is beneath the editorial standards of JVIBE.
It reveals a desperation for circulation numbers and advertising dollars that is unsettling and upsetting, coming from the only great independent U.S. based Jewish newspaper.
David Kelsey is the ad manager of Heeb Magazine and the author of The Kvetcher.
A 
Exclusive
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Forwarded to my website, following a piece about good rebbe vs. bad Rabbi
Eyes to see – Recovering Ethical Torah Principles Lost in the Holocaust” by Rabbi Yom Tov Schwarz, published by Urim Publications (NY and Jerusalem). The author has the credentials. Hes from the old school – grew up in pre-holocaust Poland where he was a recognised Torah prodidgy. He studied at Yeshivas Chochmai Lublin etc etc. Anyway, this work is a scathing critique of the current relgiious / chareidi communities! And its all expressed in halachic terminology, and referenceing tradititonal Jewish sources. He speaks out against the Kollell system, the standard of rabbinical training, the sectarianism of the charedidi and Hassidic world, the trend of diaspora Jews of wearing tallises in the street, the shithouse leadership of the Jews and so on. Its a big book, and its got big balls.
Independance is not new to this guy. He used to write responsas critiquing Rabbi Moshe Feinstein! Awesome!>>
This is one of the more popular ideas amongst the undergroud sages in Yerushalayim: The current state of what’s called orthodoxy is the only newest movement in Judaism, that traditionally, communites all had so much more lee-way to decree what their local law was, and that having Rosh Yeshivas claim to decree the law for everyone is actually a radical co-opting of our tradition, and not really the way it’s “supposed” to work.
any feelings? insights? I consider myself orthodox, like Daniel Boyarin, maintaining that “orthodox” judaism doesn’t have to mean a particular belief, as much an a engagement with halacha and a relgious community that is serious and dedicated. “orthodoxy” is a diverse plane of fundamentally different perspectives and beliefs in the world and how to deal with it, ranging from the mystically quasi-dualistic to the rationalist scientific, to the exctatic to the ascetic, with alot more different streams and movements through out history. The whole religion tends to turn on it’s head pretty often, the founding of what’s now Rabbinic Judaism being the rejection of the prophetic authority that dominated the bible. Writing it down was our original sin, and all our traditions and how to use them, what to do with the gifts our mother gave us, are utterly in our hands, to use as we see fit.
The term “Orthodoxy” is troublesome, Hirsch commented bitterly in 1854 that
…it was not “Orthodox” Jews who introduced the word “orthodox” into Jewish discussion. It was the modern “progressive” Jews who first applied the name to “old,” “backward” Jews as a derogatory term. This name was at first resented by “old” Jews. And rightfully so…
Nonetheless, I claim it, as a commitment to the tradition of teachers I have recieved from, and want it to be an adjective not limited to those obeying certain artificial limitations on thought, because that can’t be what God wants from us, not the true God, anyway.
Excerpt from the Nishmat website by R Zvi LEshem, about how Halacha is made, and what authority we have to make it
The Netziv, in his introduction to his commentary to the Sheiltot, creates a dichotomy between the decision making process of the Talmud Yerushalmi, and that of the Bavli.(In his commentary on the Chumash he attributes these models to Moshe and Aaron, but I prefer to deal with rabbinic literature only).The Yerushalmi tends to make decisions based upon accepted traditions, whereas the Bavli decides based upon sefora, Halachic reasoning.The Geonim and the Rambam are seen as the continuation of the Yerushalmi‘s approach, with the Baalei HaTosaphot in the tradition of the Bavli.He starts the piece with a very deep anecdote about his shiurim on the Mishna Berura:
For many years I taught Halacha at various schools, including Nishmat, both for beginners, with the basic text being Mishna Brura, and for more advanced students, where we would use the research method of tracing the development of the Halacha from Talmudic sources through the latest responsa.In both the goals were threefold; to teach methodology, to foster an appreciation of the Halachic system and its logic, and to arrive at a decision regarding Halacha leMaase. Initially I would ask the students, according to whom did they think the final decision would be based. The answer would often be that the Halacha goes according to the Mishna Brura.I would then surprise them with the answer, (hopefully given with humility) that in my shiur, the final Halacha is according to me!
It’s clear to me that when he says me!, he means you, the reader.
Of course intrinsic to the study was that the students would learn to go through the process with me, to understand my analysis of the sources, how I weighed the evidence, and what factors went into my decision-making process.
It was not a case of being told to blindly accept my “mysterious” rulings! I was reminded of myself going through a similar stage.I once asked my Rav, Yehoshua Reich regarding a question in Orach Chaim.When I pointed out that his answer was not in agreement with the Mishna Brura, he put me in my place with a simple “you didn’t ask the Mishna Brura-you asked me!”
There’s that me again.
The Rosh however, goes further than to give permission for a posek to question earlier decisions, he demands it!Anything less is falsehood!Here the qualified posek, is enjoined to exercise his autonomy.Similar to the critique of the Raavad on the Rambam, the posek may not rely upon early authority unless he is convinced that his decision is true.Returning to my own Halacha class, the answer that the Halacha is decided according to me, is in fact the only legitimate position. It would have been forbidden for me to “take the easy way out”, and give the Mishna Brura’s answer as final simply because he is the Mishna Brura…
Before discussing contemporary authorities, let us make one important observation regarding the “Ashkenazi” approach.While it is easy to understand the “Sefardi” approach of “playing it safe” in relation to fulfilling the word of God, the “Ashkenazi” view seems difficult to fathom.This search for the truth seems to be a very risky venture.If we really believe that the Halacha represents the will of HaShem, how dare we take chances of this sort?This question becomes even more acute when seen in light of its more radical formulations.For example, the Maharal of Prague writes in Netiv HaTora, that:
“It is proper that the posek decide from the Talmud, and even though there is the possibility that he will not …give a ruling in accordance with the truth, nonetheless the only criterion is what he understands based upon the Talmud, and even when his understanding leads him astray he is still beloved to HaShem…and he is better than someone who decides from a Code without understanding, for he is like a blind man stumbling along the way.”
Whoa. really?
Bottom line. You are the Rabbis of the generation, if you let yourselves be, and it’s not heresy to say that, not in my tradition anyway. Please try to find a better way, all the time, because we’re counting on you. And don’t give up, just because it’s hard. Like Dan quoted the pschisker awhile back, if you search for true teachers, If you pray from them with all your heart, they will be revealed to you.
Authority in this generation may not be as top down, give in to the Rabbi as it may have been, or at least that’s probably not the true ideal. If everyone is learned, and is given permission by their teachers to be their own teachers, could it be that’s more how Hashem wants us to live and learn?
The Mei Hashiloah maintains that the sin of the spies, why did they insist on not going right into The Land, was because they knew that if they went in, Moses would have to die, and they would be forced to become their own masters. They wanted so much just to be able to depend on him for Torah, and didn’t trust that it could really come through them, so they insisted on spending 40 years in the desert with him. And that’s what Moshe was so angry about, don’t you know that Hashem can give the Torah through you as well as through me?
interesting examples of the fight to clarify what halacha really means vs. what it seems to literally say:The story of Shmuel Klausenburger , a nice piece about elul and history,
any insights?
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The only Jewish Retreat Center in North America has had a digital make-over. The easy-to-forget and impossible to spell ElatChayyim.org now lives at JewishRetreatCenter.org.
EC is probably the only place you can practice authentic Jewish meditation, train for Yoga certification, or become a Jewish shamanic healer.
Drawing from across the denominational divides, teachers include Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, Mindy Ribner, Mordechai Gafni, and DovBer Pinson.
They’ve also recently launched new community initiatives such as the Ecological Apprenticeship Program and the Neshamah Fellowship in Jewish Spiritual Community, a nine-month residential training program.
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As I look forward to my short August vacation in a certain small Middle-Eastern country, I’ve been getting my beach fix here in the ultra-humid dust-mongering New York. An hour ride from the Upper West Side (on which I don’t live) is in my hate-love-hate ex-heritage sunday getaway: Brighton Beach. Time Out New York had an extensive feature on it just recently.
Brighton Beach stands out for being unabashedly Russian. But this local borscht belt welcomes anyone in the mood for unfamiliar flavors, bargain shopping and seriously over-the-top entertainment.
If you’re not keen on the mother-tongue, you can still get your “over-the-top entertainment” spilling right out of the zaftig polka-dotted tops; side by side with the tight orange speedos of the middle-aged they promise a palpable alternative to Crazy Yoseph’s fashion circle (it’s the same idea). There’re also scattered chassidim with their cigarettes and radios on the boardwalk benches, old-school-shmaltz Melrose Glatt on 2nd Brighton, and right around the corner, a massive pickles spot with awesome spicy pickled watermelon for bushier chest hair.
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Latin pop singer Ricky Martin was in the Middle East yesterday, visiting Jordan as a part of an international a goodwill tour. WaPo reports,
On his first visit to the Middle East, Ricky Martin declared he will try to change negative perceptions of Arab youth in the West.“I promise I will become a spokesperson, if you allow me to, a spokesperson on your behalf. I will defend you and try to get rid of any stereotypes,” the 33-year-old singer told youngsters from 16 mainly Arab countries at a youth conference on Monday.
During the course of his visit, Martin stopped for a photo-op, in which a kaffiyeh was draped over his shoulders. Written in Arabic, at the base of the kaffiyeh, was the statement, “Jerusalem is ours.” In the photograph, he is also holding a plaque of Palestine (aka Israel) situated atop a kaffieyh pattern.
Martin issued an apology this morning:
“I had no idea that the kaffiyeh scarf presented to me contained language referring to Jerusalem, and I apologise to anyone who might think I was endorsing its message.“My role is entirely humanitarian, and I will continue to promote the elimination of stereotyping anyone – be they from Latin America, the Middle East, or anywhere across the globe.”
Full story. (c/o Darieus)
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Calling all yentas: actor David Schwimmer has let it be known that he’s looking for kosher meat. No news of whether he has gotten a profile up on Jdate yet, but he has, at least, been quoted as saying, “My parents would be thrilled (if I married a Jew). It makes things a lot easier, sharing a cultural and religious background….”
He does not appear to have a personal website, so I regret that I can’t offer information as to where interested applicants might apply.
Anyway, full story, what little of it there is, here.
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Congrats to Lance Armstrong on his seventh straight Tour De France win. Now it’s inevitable that we’ll be seeing more and more of those ubiquitous “Livestrong” bracelets. And, of course, as with all fads, there’s eventually a Jewish equivalent.
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Sam Apple, author of the popular novel Schlepping Through The Alps, a staffer at Nerve, and a friend from a former life (ie., back in NYC), has won this year’s Faux Faulkner competition for a piece depicting George W. Bush in the role of Benjy (an “idiot” child) in a modern sendup of The Sound And The Fury.
I do declare, mazal tov!
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A self-identifying Jewish African-American from Las Vegas, Prophet Yahweh is your typical observant North American Jew. He’s committed religiously, makes a good living in the entertainment industry, and is past 30 and predictably single. But Prophet Yahweh posseses one ability which sets him apart from the sheer majority of his coreligionists: He has allegedly learned to summon UFOs from reading the Torah.
In a recent appearance on Las Vegas’ ABC-13, Prophet Yahweh demonstrates his unique and profound ability, summoning two unidentified objects to appear in the sky before the rolling television cameras. He has also predicted that a UFO will soon appear above Las Vegas, clearly visible for all to see.
This would be a startling revelation, were in not for these photos of Prophet Yahweh parading about with mylar weather balloons. More on the bunk “prophet” with the chutzpahdik name here.
I was nervous for a minute there. But thankful I’d sent my $30 to “Bob”. Reminds me of Malachi Z. York and the Nuwaubians too much anyway.
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The UK Register wildly speculates about a peculiarly shaped building spotted at the US Navy Exchange in San Diego.
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Aviran reports, by way of Ynet (and let me just preference this with one big sic),
The Israeli National Institute of Standards have being practicing in a controversial activity. In the name of “helping to inform the public†the National Institute of Standards hired a company to send email messages thru the company’s distribution list (in other words spam list).An Israeli hacker tired of getting these spam messages have taken an action and hacked to the server where the email database is stored. After he got access to the database he deleted all the data from the spammer’s database, deleted all user names and passwords to the database and changed the database’s admin password.
“After the third time I got these spam messages I managed to hack into their management system and deleted their entire database,” said the hacker, identified himself as Anti-Spammer.
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Recent legislation extending Daylight Savings Time is meeting some resistence in the frum sector. DST extended to November would mean that the sun wouldn’t rise in most places until 8:30 or 8;45, making it just about impossible to get a minyan through Shacharit in time to hit work by 9.
This is a serious moral pickle, given that the DST extension has the potential to save something like 100,000 barrels of oil.
Full story here.
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Hey campers. My name’s Crazy Yoseph, aka Yoseph Crack when I post, Yoseph Leib more accurately. But most of my friends call me crazy, which is liberating actually. It means free to actually speak your passions, and I remember longing in elementary school to be able to go crazy, so frustrated because I couldn’t figure out how to do it.
Speaking of figuring, I finally figured out how to post to Jewschool, after years of somehow not be able to work it out. Some of you might know me from Cannabis Chassidis, and if you haven’t looked at it since it’s inception, there’s a nice fresh piece there exploring the mystery of simplicity vs. sophistication, acknowledging that we use truths as drugs to make us able to either do things, or be free to stop doing things. This is the nature of all Guidance, it’s either a sam Maves, a death drug to settle you into a safe zone of relative un-being, cool you off, or a life drug, to give you permission to be, and awake you into experience. All torah is either of these and there’s new insight welcoming y’all on the website there all the time, about the mystery of drugs and how to use them best.
But let me start here by inviting y’all for shabbos. This last few days, some incredible insight and willingness towards presence had open up, and I think good things are comin’ up and out. Click here for more info.
I hope y’all have fun no matter what.
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The Christian Broadcast Network is repeatedly airing a program starring former Sachnut (Jewish Agency for Israel) chief Sallai Meridor, Finance Minister Bibi Netanyahu, Deputy Prime Minister Ehud Olmert, along with the head of the JDC in Israel, Rabbi Yaakov Bleich of Kiev and Yechiel Eckstein, and old, sick Jews from the FSU. The co-stars are Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, Pat Boone and a host of evangelicals telling their flocks that the elderly Jews of the FSU are targets of rabid antisemites who are, essentially, coming to kill them in their beds.
Viewers are asked to send in $350 for every Jew so a one-way ticket to Israel could be bought for each one. Yesterday, Collette Avital’s committee announced that 1/3 of the Holocaust survivors in Israel are living below the poverty line and are in despair. No home care, no teeth, no glasses, no clean sheets to die on with dignity. Her committee deals with the misappropriation of Holocaust victims’ bank accounts by Bank Leumi, and there is also mention the government’s confiscation of the lands the victims owned in Israel–which all have to be handed back to the survivors, but won’t be anytime soon. The government is stonewalling. Zev Factor and Noach Flug, who head up the main survivor agencies in Israel and serve on the Claims Conference which distributes survivor restitution funds and payments to survivors in Israel through the Sachnut (Jewish Agency), say the situation is outrageous.
In the FSU food packages to survivors cost $25 a month (according to Amir Shaviv and Steve Schwager of the JDC, in the US–which lost millions of budget dollars due to cutbacks in grants from the UJC, from the US Government and a drop in donations). In Israel these same food packages cost upwards of $200 a month. Yet more than half a million children in Israel are going hungry, too.
1. How does the Prime Minister justify this campaign to bring old sick Jews to Israel, and where will he get the money to pay for a roof over their heads, their health care, food and funerals?
2. Televangicals are very effective at raising money, and we know they get millions upon millions of dollars from these programs. How is the money from this program being used by the Israeli agencies mentioned in the program, and why did the Finance Minister and Deputy Prime Minister participate?
3. In light of the health and death crisis facing the survivors, how does the Israeli government justify spending millions upon millions of Claims Conference dollars to send Jewish children to Auschwitz and pay for luxury cruises on the Mediterranean called the Exodus Floating Seminar? (People out there say that Auschwitz is not Judaism, and Judaism is not Auschwitz. Neither is Zionism Judaism, and Judaism Zionism, so that saying it makes them better Jews is problematical. What kind of Jews does it make is a better question.)
To our inquiry, the Prime Minister’s spokesman, David Baker, responded, “The Prime Minister’s office has no comment on this issue.”
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Our boys from Beyond Eden have announced their next tour and wave of performances, including the International Hillel confrence in Georgia and the Yidstock festival in the catskills. As for over a year, I still say they are the next huge thing.
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As CK thought it right to take a pot shot at the Bronfmans in the midst of tonguing Dov Charney’s jewel-encrusted anus, I feel it’s only appropriate to bring an eye of focus onto the Bronfmans — the Jewish community’s biggest philanthropic family — and permit them to offer their own defense.
In the early 1990s, Edgar transferred management of the family businesses to his son, Edgar, Jr., a rebellious young man who was fond of glamour and the good life. He received a well-established company, which at its peak in 1984 was worth $40 billion (including a quarter of the stock in chemical giant DuPont). In 1998, Charles left the joint management of the company and the board supported Edgar, Jr.’s policy of converting Seagram’s field of specialization to media. In the early 1990s, the company had already made several acquisitions in the fields of music, cinema and entertainment, the most prominent being the purchase of Universal Studios.The sexy image of the media boosted Seagram’s stock, and in the summer of 2000, the company was sold to the French media giant Vivendi, in return for a Vivendi stock package. At the end of 2001, Vivendi crashed and the Bronfmans’ fortune shrank by 70 percent. The $3 billion that Charles had on paper became $800 million. These are his “big troubles.”
“I was very much against the DuPont sale. I was very much against all the entertainment deals. I vehemently objected to everything we did. It was all a mistake.”
So why didn’t they hear you say so out loud?
“I decided that I wouldn’t wage a public war against my family.”
It cost you a lot of money.
“There are certain situations in life where it’s hard to say what’s right and what’s wrong. You do what you believe you must do and that’s it.”
“This is still a very wealthy family,” comments Andrea. “And in life there are things that are a lot more important than money. We’re fortunate that we have enough money left for the things we like to do. What’s in the soul is more important than what’s in the pocket.”
Read the story of Andrea & Charles Bronfman in last week’s Haaretz magazine.
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