Yeah but ben David is wayyyyyyyyyy wicked!

This following section is a direct quote from the Taliban Code of Ethics.
Perhaps the learned rabbis should consult with their counterparts at the madrassa to enact rules that cover all tenets of proper and moral behavior for all Jews and Muslims:
“To prevent music. In shops, hotels, vehicles and rickshaws, cassettes and music are prohibited. This matter be monitored within five days. If any music cassette is found in a shop, the shopkeeper be imprisoned and shop locked. If cassette is found, the vehicle and the driver be imprisoned.”
Here are some more guidelines, just in case you want to undertake some pre-Elul teshuva:
Some decrees issued by Taliban’s religious police on code of conduct in Afghanistan:
* To prevent sedition and uncovering of women’s body. No drivers to pick up women, even the ones using Iranian burqa. In case of violation, the driver will be imprisoned. If such kind of females are observed in the street, their houses will be found and their husbands punished.
* To prevent music. In shops, hotels, vehicles and rickshaws, cassettes and music are prohibited. This matter be monitored within five days. If any music cassette is found in a shop, the shopkeeper be imprisoned and shop locked. If cassette is found, the vehicle and the driver be imprisoned.
* To prevent shaving and cutting beard. If anyone found having shaved and/or cut his beard, they be arrested and imprisoned until their beard gets bushy.
* To prevent keeping pigeons and playing with birds. This habit/hobby should stop and be monitored and the pigeons and any other playing birds be killed.
* To prevent kite-flying. The kite shops in the city be abolished.
* To prevent idolatry. In vehicles, shops, hotels, rooms and any other place, pictures/portraits be abolished.
* To prevent British and American hairstyle. People with long hair be arrested and taken to the Religious Police to shave their head. The criminal has to pay the barber.
* To prevent washing of clothes by young ladies in city streams. Violator ladies be picked up in respectful Islamic manner, taken to their houses and their husbands severely punished.
* To prevent music and dances in wedding parties. In case of violation, the head of family be arrested and punished.
* To prevent sewing ladies cloth and taking female measures by male tailor. If women or fashion magazines are seen in the shop, the tailor be imprisoned.
* To prevent not praying. Prayers should be done on their due times. Traffic be strictly prohibited and all people are obliged to go to the mosque. Young people seen in shops be immediately imprisoned.
Rules of work for the State Hospitals and private clinics based on Islamic Sharia principles (Ministry of Health, on behalf of Amir ul Momineen Mullah Mohammad Omar, Kabul, November 1996).
* Female patients to go to female physicians. In case a male physician is needed, the female patient be accompanied by her close relative.
* During examination, the female patient and male physician both be dressed in Islamic veil.
* Male physician not to touch or see other parts of female patient except for the affected part.
* Waiting room for female patients be safely covered.
* Male and female doctors not allowed to sit/speak with each other. If there be need for discussion, it be done in hijab (veil).
* Female doctors to wear simple clothes. Not allowed to wear stylish clothes or use cosmetics or make-up.
* Female doctors or nurses not allowed to enter rooms where male patients are hospitalised.