OY. Thank you to Oliver Miller from the FasterTimes for summing up this ridiculousness and saying what we were all thinking:

OHHHHH CHRISTMAS YOU SO FINE YOU SO FINE YOU BLOW MY MIND, GO CHRISTMAS! CLAP CLAP CLAP! GO CHRISTMAS! Awesome job, The Gap, way to go! You have created an ad that is a uniquely horrible combination of a Toni Basil song, the movie “Bring It On,” “Stomp,” the Blue Man Group, and everything else that is terrible in this universe. …GO CHRISTMAS! CLAP CLAP CLAP!