I’m no fan of the Jerusalem Post. Never really have been. If you need an explaination, two words that should sum things up nicely are “Caroline Glick.” Caroline Glick is a right-wing ideologue of the worst variety, and the deputy managing editor of the Post, who, while emedded in Iraq, rushed to report that US troops had discovered a chemical weapons plant, though in fact, they had not. Glick, who, rumor has it, has been asked to work the night shift from home because none of her co-workers can stand to be in the same room with her, and, under whose editorship the Post continues to run rampant with typographical and factual errors, is regularly given a soap box in the editorial section of the paper to, for example, charge the American Jewish Left with Hamas’ victory.
So when the Post’s subscription department called me up one evening, pushing me to subscribe, I was reluctant to say the least. In fact, I must have said, “no thank you” and “not interested” two dozen times before hanging up. When they called back ten minutes later insisting they’d give me “an unbeatable deal” I finally caved just to get them to leave me the hell alone.
Big mistake. Two months later, after having my newspaper stolen two out of six days of the week, and having yet to receive a single copy of the Friday paper — which I told them would happen when I explained why I didn’t want to subscribe; and past the point of sheer infuriation with their op-ed pages and the likes of Caroline Glick — let alone the news section and its consistent inaccuracies and sins of omission; I decided to cancel, only to discover that I was locked into a three month committment (which no one told me when I subscribed) and that if I cancelled now, I would have to pay the full cover price for the two months I’d received, including the stolen papers.
I discovered this information during a phonecall I received three days after calling to cancel, because apparently, you’re not allowed to cancel your subscription without getting a call from a salesman who does everything in his power to dissaude you from cancelling. I feel like I’m dealing with AOL…
So this one’s for you Jerusalem Post, and the strong-arm tactics with which you coerce subscriptions to your worthless rag of a newspaper:

I’d wipe my ass with your paper, but I think it’d be covered in more shit afterwards.
To be sure, I’ll be calling you again in a month to cancel.